Growing Up

I think we need to talk.

Look, this isn’t easy to say, but it’s best to just come out with it… I think we should break up.

I just feel like we’ve been growing apart for a while now. I mean, we hardly ever talk. Sometimes weeks go by without hearing from you.

We used to spend hours staring out the window during school, or playing with Legos in my room. Now I feel like all of our time together is nothing more than fleeting moments that are quickly forgotten. I still enjoy our time in bed just before sleep, but in the morning you’re always gone—somewhere just beyond my reach.

It’s not you, it—it’s me. I’ve changed—or I need to change. I need to move on to the next phase of my life and become a real adult. I can’t keep living in our fantasy world and spending all my time in the clouds. I need to get serious. I have a job. I have bills to pay. I have obligations and commitments to attend to. I’m just too busy to make time for you anymore.

Sure, I’m scared to go it alone, but I can’t ignore the success of business men and professionals that have also broken up with you. I don’t know what will happen to both of us in the future. You gave my life inspiration and color, but I guess being an adult means facing the grayscale reality of business suits, corporate culture, and industry.

Look, I’ll never forget the time we had together. No one in the entire universe knows me as well as you, and I doubt anyone ever will. You made growing up possible. You turned a lonely kid into so much more. You gave me a friend: and escape from the harsh realities of adolescence. With you, I was the ruler of ancient kingdoms; I was a warrior in space defeating legions of alien combatants; I was the builder of the eighth wonder of the world; I was a god and you were my muse. I could be anything I dreamed to be and you were everything I needed you to be.

I’m just not that guy anymore. I’m like the billions of others practically suffocating in the stagnant humidity of the subway during rush hour each day. Like them, I have to give you up and face reality. I can’t continue to rely on you. I’m not special, and it’s about time I realized that.

But you are special. You’re limitless. All I’d do is hinder you when you should be free. I don’t deserve you. In fact, I’m not sure that I ever did. You deserve a kid willing to fight for you; someone that knows what a wondrous gift you are and cherishes every moment with you; someone that is willing to spend their entire life in the clouds, creating galaxies and exploring the highest peaks of inspiration and the deepest chasms of their mind with you.

I tried my best to hold on to you, but I’m not strong enough. I’m sorry.

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6 comments

  1. shaunkellett · August 23, 2016

    This was incredibly well written but, at the same time, incredibly sad. Nobody should need to give up their imagination! Great piece though.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Nick Anthony · August 23, 2016

      Thank you! I agree, but unfortunately the very idea of “professionalism” seems to suppress the expression of one’s imagination. We day-dreamers must resolve to stubbornly forge on, I suppose

      Liked by 1 person

      • shaunkellett · August 23, 2016

        I think it’s important we resist the suppression. My office is fairly “proper”, bit backwards with lots of red tape… Still, it’s my imagination keeping me sane! Daydreaming is like a vacation for me each day.

        Like

  2. steflifeandstuff · August 25, 2016

    this was very heartbreaking, are you really sure about this.your imagination makes you special and i agree with shaun, my imagination keeps me sane aswell. You should let it out on paper or something, but don’t give it up. you are a creative being and you could still be a business man, just use your imagination to make money then, alot of directors and writers do, just please give it another chance. i’m not lecturing, i’ve just been where you are and it resulted in my life sucking, now i have to start all over. Hope you change your mind.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Nick Anthony · August 25, 2016

      Thank you for the kind words. I’m definitely not parting with my imagination. I’d like to thinking I’m still fighting the good fight on that front. Yet I am in the thrall of considering my career path having been in the workplace for several years now. This piece was more of an exercise for me to see what it would be like to leave the imaginative part of my life behind. I think the fact that it came out so depressing is a sign that I am not ready to part with it yet!

      Like

      • steflifeandstuff · August 25, 2016

        definitely not, and even if you try it will never leave you,keep fighting and good luck with your career,remember you’re already great.

        Liked by 1 person

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